Making those “just getting by” moments meaningful.
Getting your child up, ready and out the door, getting them to sign on for their virtual classes in time, tone of voice, eye-rolling, siblings arguing, screen time arguments, homework. How many times a day do you find yourself trying to “just get by” one of these challenging events with your child? What if I were to tell you that we can use all our day to day interactions with our children including the frustrating ones as learning, connecting moments with them.
Here are some steps to get you started:
You can start by journaling about a specific moment from the last week when an interaction with your child and you did not go well.
- Write down your actions and how you responded to your child.
- When you look back at your responses categorize what parts of you were “just getting by” and what parts were connecting, teachable moments that could be applied to their future.
It’s important to encourage yourself that those just getting by moments are ok. The focus here is how much you were also paying attention to building long term tools that will grow your connection, helping your child grow and benefit from that encounter.
We all have triggers and these triggers can get in the way of relating with our children. “Having a child feel understood requires more than just kind words or recognizing a feeling. The overall feel of the exchange needs to be full of warmth and caring for that connection to occur.” Siegel, D. (2015) The Whole Brain Child Workbook.
If you would like to learn more or find yourself needing more support please contact me for an appointment today. I would be happy to talk with you further.